family forgiveness

A Cliffhanger: Where We Learn to Reconcile

One of the most important skills we can demonstrate to the children in our lives is how to reconcile in a way that actually transforms a relationship. The number one indicator of how I am most likely to respond to conflict in my adult life is how I saw conflict responded to by the adults … Continue reading “A Cliffhanger: Where We Learn to Reconcile”


Seek Relationships that Speak Truth into You

In our current culture, people who speak the truth to us are hard to find. When you have an opportunity to deepen a relationship with a truth-teller in your life, take it! What we say to participants in One Another Project is, choose those relationships in your life that are important to you and we … Continue reading “Seek Relationships that Speak Truth into You”


Being the Voice of Peace

In a divided culture of “us versus them”, being the friend who encourages reason and peace may be risky, but the rewards are enormous. I’m pretty confident that your Facebook feed of all your friends’ posts and comments doesn’t look all that different from mine. Aside from the occasional dog/cat video, much of the discourse … Continue reading “Being the Voice of Peace”

Friends Bearing Gifts

When it comes to quality of the friends and family in your life, you have more control than you might think. Have you ever received a gift from someone and you just knew deep down that it was not to be trusted? Maybe it was a friend or family member who just wanted something specific … Continue reading “Friends Bearing Gifts”

who am I

The Puzzle of “Who Am I?”

    While the puzzle of “who am I?” is yours to piece together, don’t be fooled by friends, family, tribes or even your own feelings. There is a truer source for your identity than any of those. His father told him he was a shepherd. And that had certainly become his reality‚Ķone in which … Continue reading “The Puzzle of “Who Am I?””

gun control protest

Who Will Teach Them to Listen Well?

We’ve taught the next generation to be advocates for important causes, but who will teach them to listen well? The last several days’ news of young people around the country advocating for different gun laws makes me proud, and maybe a little sad. Social media has taught them persuasive argument, a critical skill for advocacy. … Continue reading “Who Will Teach Them to Listen Well?”

hope out of rubble

Where is My Hope? Let Me Be Clear

Can’t we be good citizens without placing all our hope in political solutions? If you are my friend, won’t you let me be clear about where my hope really is? From time to time, we all get sucked into conversations of which we would rather not be a part. Maybe it is about politics, or … Continue reading “Where is My Hope? Let Me Be Clear”

blueprint design purpose

Helping Me Discern

What could be more encouraging than to help someone hear and understand God’s calling on their life, i.e., to help someone clearly discern and do exactly what they were created to do? As a mediator, I spend a great deal of my time sitting and listening to warring parties expressing their pain in, sometimes, pretty … Continue reading “Helping Me Discern”


Confession and the Importance of Being Right

Nothing says, “I value this relationship” quite like confession and surrender. We are living in a culture of advocacy and tribal contention. If watching the news or listening to talk radio or reading through your social media feeds makes you angry or frustrated, that is probably the reason. We are literally inundated with voices screaming … Continue reading “Confession and the Importance of Being Right”

forgiveness and love

Forgiveness as the Measure of Real Love

Nothing says “love” quite like forgiveness. I don’t think many of us in this culture are really struggling with whether love is a good thing. I think most of us know we should love others, even those with whom we disagree. But what we are struggling with is what, exactly, love looks like in certain … Continue reading “Forgiveness as the Measure of Real Love”